Tips for Choosing a Marital Therapist

Consulting a marriage therapist is no assurance that your marriage will work out. But it does increase the odds that it will, so yes, it is worth giving a try. Then again, not all marriage therapists are the same. In fact, not all therapists are qualified to provide marital therapy, so if you're considering someone in particular, ask about his or her training.

Remember, therapy for an individual doesn't work for a couple because the dynamics are automatically different from the very start. A marriage therapist is trained to help people conquer individual differences that come normally when two people live under one roof.

That is why you have to choose the right professional to help you and spouse fix your marriage.

Aside from ensuring that the therapist you plan to see is actually a marriage therapist, here are other important considerations for you to make:

> Therapists who are themselves pro-marriage will do better at saving a marriage than those who aren't. Don't hesitate to ask your marriage counseling in blue ash ohio therapist about their own feelings about marriage and divorce. The answer you get will be very enlightening.

> Your therapist should respect you and make you feel comfortable. During your sessions, you should feel that they understand you and your feelings. If they take sides - yours or your spouse' - that's a bad sign. If your therapist values your opinions, that's a good sign. Otherwise, look for another therapist.

> Some people think therapists are able to tell if a marriage is hopeless, but these professionals don't really have this kind of knowledge. Besides, if they tell you you're incompatible or it's time to move on with your separate lives, they're merely reflecting their values on you, which is totally unethical.

> You and your marriage counseling in blue ash ohio therapist should be able to set clear goals from the beginning. If you don't, you could end up wasting session after session, directionless. As soon as you set your goals, keep to them. If you don't see any progress after two or three meetings, tell your therapist how you feel.

> Couples who are having problems shouldn't have to keep going back to the past and analyzing their childhood issues. If your therapist wants you to spend more of your time there, politely suggest being more future-oriented. If they don't take your lead, find someone who's more open-minded.

> Understand that most marriage issues can be resolved. Don't let anyone - even your therapist - tell you otherwise. Humans are just amazing creatures - they can do very great things, especially when they love the people they have to do it for.

> Always trust your gut. You would know if your therapist is rally helping. If they're not, you would know as well. Don't be happy with a therapist who's helping you survive your marital conflicts. Find someone who will make you swim past them.